I Have No Self-Control and QaF Fic Recs

[sisabet]

Those Angel season 5 pics floating around? Went and looked at 'em. Was only gonna look at one. Heh. I'm still spoiler-freeish. Kinda like a technical virgin I suppose.

Today was a little rough - started out fine, I clipped, I talked, I read (more later) and I decided to go shopping - on the way to the store I saw something that upset me - no big deal - it happens sometimes, but the next thing I know I'm just sick. I came home and now I'm pretty much blah. I was supposed to go out tonight but it ain't happening.

QaF US Fic Recs or Omigod! Something to Read!

So - if you are not following mintwitch obsessively, please start now. I mean, don't like scare her or anything, just go and read how she is filling in the blanks - early Brian and Michael. I really cannot praise it enough.
Parts 1-4 here:
http://www.livejournal.com/users/mintwitch/93799.html
Part 5 here:
http://www.livejournal.com/users/mintwitch/94405.html

Everything is set pre-season one (actually it is all set in the early 90's) so no spoilers at all.

This story was rec'ed to me by silviakundera right before I left for Vividcon, I clicked on it - read 2 lines, decided the second person was icky and jumped on a plane. Then eliade rec'd it - advised up front it was second person, give it a chance so I tried it again. I will read whatever silviakundera tells me to read from now on.

Lachrymose by Bianca:
http://www.qaf-fic.com/archive/20/lachrymose.html

This just got to me - actually it was much more affecting the second time I read it - I was reading to hurriedly and was distracted the first time through. Go read it and if you want to come back here and discuss - I'm okay with that. I really have a soft spot apparently for fic that tackles not whether Brian could love Justin, but should he love him? Guh.
-Potentially Spoilers up to mid season 2 but very vague. I'd say it is safe if you've seen up to 2x04.

Bianca can write. Bianca writes QaF US. - Unfortunately I can only find 2 of her fics. "Sympathy for the Dead" is the other one and I found myself enjoying it despite myself. See, this story has not one but two things I just can't stand in B/J fic. I still liked it. Again, if silviakundera tells me to read it, I will. Even if it has elements that squick me. Unless it is Mpreg. I can't read the Mpreg. At least, I'm fairly certain I can't read the Mpreg.
http://www.qaf-fic.com/atp/modules.php?op=modload&name=Fanfiction&file=index&options=DisplayStory&storyid=1636

Speaking of silviakundera, "The Continued Adventures of Brian, Justin and Justin's Boyfriend" just cracks me up.

http://www.livejournal.com/users/silviakundera/657570.html

ETA: rachelanton73 rec'd this in the comments and man I gotta agree, set post 3x09
Michael/Justin
Once and Again by seperis
http://www.livejournal.com/users/seperis/79582.html

Okay - here we go. Here is the big rec. Here is what we have been waiting for - rachelanton73 and blaurosen have been tempting us forever with the knowledge that they were collaborating on a project together. Okay - it hasn't been months, only weeks, but still.

A few days ago the chapters started going up. Laura has designed a gorgeous site for the fic and I would go and look at the site. I would run my cursor lovingly over the chapter links and then I would go away because I knew that once I got started reading this fic, I would not be able to stop. Hence, it only made sense to wait until all of the chapters are posted, especially since Rachel assured us it will only be a few days from now. Or at least a week.

I'm weak. I caved.

OMIGOD THIS IS FUCKING INCREDIBLE.

Forget about waiting - go read now.
Set after 3x14
Maps and Legends: http://www.geocities.com/blaurosen/new_page_1.htm

Now - I could be considerate and feedback the authors and I will - but right now I'm gonna LJ-cut to just generally Squeee about what I loved in this fic. Go read and join me, but don't read what I write until you read the fic cause I'm all spoilerific beyound the cut tags:


What I loved and what Got Me - a short history featuring me cutting and pasting and drooling and kinda freaking out that I can't finish reading this yet. I told ya'll I could hurt myself having to stop reading this one. I was not kidding. I am doing this now to distract myself from several things, the least of which is I need a new chapter to read cause [gulp] Vegas!

Stage one is his everyday, more-or-less functional level of inebriation. At stage two he's walking a little funny, talking too much and too loud, usually looking for more to drink. By stage three he's nearly incoherent, and can veer wildly between suffocating affection and shocking, sudden belligerence. I don't think I've ever seen stage four, but Michael says it's absolutely terrifying.

At this point while reading I was nodding and agreeing. Good fic tends to do that to me.

I don't even wanna explain the emaciated kitties. Let's just call it my blue period and leave it at that.

I fucking did not just laugh out loud, I howled.

His eyes were huge and I'd almost have called him "Mikey" had he not had his damn thumbnail between his teeth. I can't laugh at him when he's doing that, can't tease him.

Oh, yeah. He does that. This whole chapter with the camping out was so nicely visual for me, but I just loved that touch, that noticing of a mannerism, especially through Brian's POV.

The whole Frank Sinatra Impotence exchange was hysterical.

The look he gave me was utterly unreadable, but the fact that he gave me a look at all told me that he remembered, and was glad that I did too. Brian loves to be quoted.

Yes he does. Again with the nodding from me. This nodding - pretty much a theme while reading.

That when I looked at that part of his life now, sometimes it made me feel sick- not jealous, or even turned on like I sometimes used to be, just queasy and sort of sad for him. That I still hoped he might stop someday, but not for me. For him.

and then

Didn't want to let him know that sometimes I wonder what I'll do when he's dead- that I know he'll die before me, before he's supposed to, if he keeps living the way he does, and it terrifies me more than anything in the world. If I hadn't left the bar when I did, if he hadn't followed me...if, if, if. I stay awake at night worrying about that kind of stuff.

Oh, Justin...oh poor baby, yeah. Brian is killing himself and you know it.

But then to balance that we get this:

He gasped and laughed and pulled my head away from him. "Oh my god, it's the apocalypse isn't it?" He was beaming. "You made me a mix!"

I knit my brow. "What the fuck are you talking about? I did not make you a mix."

"A mix, you made it, yes you did!" He insisted.

"No I didn't!! It's for me. It's on MY player."

But he was giggling so much I don't think he really was listening. "Uh huh..."

I twisted my mouth. "Look, it's not like I'm giving it to you. I'll probably erase it all in a few days and put new shit on there. So, no."

"Right, okay..."

"It's not like you can KEEP it. It's not on your very own CD. I just threw it down. Took five minutes - what?"

He was laughing so hard he started to snort. "You...loooooooove me," he whispered and pulled my head down for a kiss.

Are we certain this never happened on the show? I think it happened...

Oh God, then when we get to Vegas. Oh, yeah - not a good idea. Post season 3 Brian in Vegas. Well any Brian in Vegas is not a good idea, but this Brian just - well yeah, this is what would happen. And Justin and I feel exactly the same way about casinos and I had a little moment of bonding there. And then they gave us a tub scene. Granted it was a tub scene of dodging emotional bullets rather than a tub scene of hot NC-17 boy on boy action, but a kink is a kink is a kink and I'll take the tub-love anyway I can get it.

And then Justin sees the fourth level of drunk and Brian says this:

"Job...plus Justin...plus love...equals no job," he slurred at me, then passed out on my shoulder.

See - ever since Brian asked Justin in 3x05 "You expect him to sacrifice his career for a piece of blonde boy ass? Is that your idea of true love, Sunshine?" I have been waiting for some address of this, because in essence, Brian did just that.

And now I am getting all rambly and I'm trying to type this and watch a movie at the same time and nothing is realy being accomplished so I'll shut up.

Comments

[sparkledark.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you thank you! I'm so glad you're enjoying and that you decided to check it out before it was finished. Knowing that you're liking it and waiting for more is just the motivation I need to finish these final edits. Yay!

Also, have you read this?
http://www.livejournal.com/users/seperis/79141.html

Very cool Justin and Mikey snippet, post 3x09, by Seperis. Go read and beg for more.

[sisabet.livejournal.com]

It's like Christmas!!

So I woke up this morning and grabbed my printo out of Maps and Legends again and - well it is really good. The Justin voice is perfect - and also I find myself identifying with him even more than on the show, you guys have his speech patterns and mannerisms nailed - so very good.

But Brian, Brian is hard to write - especially first person, but you are doing it. You are doing it in a way that does not feel forced or clumsy - this is Brian - hang on - I've got some Brian stuff that I just love here - let me quote you back to you:

I sighed heavily. Fuck. How was I going to fix this? I couldn't have him being angry the whole night. I still wanted to fuck him.

See - you took a very dicey internal thought and then totally Brianized it with the last line. Perfect.

And this - well I can see this happening:
looked away from his gaze and used my other hand to rub my neck.

"Actually, when you come right down to it, you're probably the most romantic bastard I've ever met."

Oh God, someone shut this kid up. I kept looking toward the lake, trying to pretend I wasn't listening.

"But don't worry," he assured me, not falling for my pretense, "I won't tell anyone." He got up on his knees and took my face with his hands, then kissed me very gently.


Awww...

So Dawn and I were discussing this fic last night and we both agreed our favorite line was:

"The what? What rock? You fucked The Rock?"

Cause - Bwahaha. And also - that is what I thought Brian meant as well.

oh my! she printed it out!!

[blaurosen.livejournal.com]

Do you have any idea how happy that makes me?

Almost as happy as that massively huge and important compliment you gave me up there:

But Brian, Brian is hard to write - especially first person, but you are doing it. You are doing it in a way that does not feel forced or clumsy - this is Brian -

Fuck yeah that bastard was a bastard to write! See, we both write the dialouge and then we go back to it and Rachel writes the Justin POV and I write the Brian. And here's me constantly asking myself:

"Okay, how to I get him to admit this without admitting it? Okay, how do I get Brian to express this thought so that he believes he's not really expressing it?"

Because, he's essentially a prissy shmoopy seventh grade girl doing his damnedest to hide it by playing the part of a gay man ho.

But, phewwwwwwwwww, sisabet says it's Brian, phewwwwwwwwww

and she printed it out!!! eeeeeeeeeeeee!

Re: oh my! she printed it out!!

[sisabet.livejournal.com]

Hell, yeah I printed it out. I also pack it from room to room with me, hissing possessively whenever anyone (or dog) gets to close to it. Except for the few hours yesterday when I relinquished it so Dawn could read it. But then I took it straight back.

Man I cherish this.

Because, he's essentially a prissy shmoopy seventh grade girl doing his damnedest to hide it by playing the part of a gay man ho.

He so is. Sniff. I love him. The bastard.

[sparkledark.livejournal.com]

But Brian, Brian is hard to write - especially first person, but you are doing it. You are doing it in a way that does not feel forced or clumsy - this is Brian

Oh, I'm not doing it at all. That's all Laura. I would never even attempt to write 1st person Brian. Cause, yeah. HARD. She rocks out loud. If I ever do write Brian pov myself, it's gonna be in a very removed 3rd person voice.

And I'll just repeat Laura's squeee!!! You printed it out! :-)

[sisabet.livejournal.com]

But you've got Justin nailed as well - down to the fact that I can physically hear his voice in my head. I'm seriously getting obsessed with this story - it cannot be healthy.

[jaymalea]

Me, too. *g*

I'm haunting your site, waiting for new chapters. Each time I slide my mouse over the title, and wait for the link. Is it up yet? is it, huh, is it? *silly*

I'm in heaven. So many links to QAF authors and recs on LJ, where 2 months ago there were so few! And seperis is writing Brian and Justin. I swear I've done something right in this lifetime, to have that wish granted.

[sisabet.livejournal.com]

QaF ficwise, things are so very definitely looking up. I heart the smart women on LJ.