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sisabetAnd I really should make a more substantive post - tell everyonhe about the move, my experiences with true love (all on TV of course), Mom reading Dawn's "I am Brian Kinney!" posts (including the friend's locked ones - thanks ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
caphricacorn) and my dog becoming so traumatized by 4th of July fireworks a 1/2 mile away on the 3rd of July that he ran away and hid all night while I searched the perimeter of my parent's farm with a flashlight and Cappy. He is safe and sound now for at least another year , but it was quite the story! Oh - or all about the move and my semi-not-really nervous breakdown that actually turned out to be the bit of drama-queen I haven't grown out of still residing deep with in my psyche. I could tell ya'll about work and how I am now know as the "quiet" one and I sit huddled at my desk and get my job done in 2 hours because it is fucking boring but I still have to be there so I just sit. If the internet wasn't monitored closely, I would be happy. Also - back in a city where going for Mexican food is considered "exotic" - Dear Lord what was I thinking?
I could tell ya'll all about J's class reunion and him hooking up with the validictorian (that's my boy - going for brains over brawn. I swear he is so much more complex than me) or about the fact that I really do miss my Memphis people. Even the ones that got on my nerves. I could post about the smoking ban that the city of Lexigton just enacted - no smoking in any public places and how this seems to include not only the Cigar Bar but also the tobacco warehouses (Sorry Mr. Buyer from Brown & Williamson and Mr. Bidder from Philip Morris. Please buy our fabulous burley, but ya gotta go light that up outside). I mean - I understand limiting second-hand smoke and all - but c'mon. Exemptions people. Exemptions.
I could tell ya about the beautiful welcome wagon of the neighborhood boys that showed up on my doorstep last week - Todd and Kendell and apparently they are so pretty they made the apartment brochure. I don't think they even have to pay rent - just show up at various complex parties and say hi to the new people. Very, very pretty. I of course was unable to do more beyond gawking. I can gawk like a pro, though.
Instead I will say this: I loveheres_luck and I love my new icon. It makes me happy. I'll also say that I was at turns enjoying and becoming extremely frustrated with recent events on Nummy Treat. I know I come off as a raging bitch there, so I don't know if any of my posts are taken seriously anymore - but dammit. I take this seriously. And I had to get bitchy - otherwise I would explode - but I want the group back that introduced me to Lum, and here's luck and renenet and Kamil and Jainie and Wendy and well - just about everyone. And it just doesn't look like it is gonna happen. Fuck. I know there is still Boot Camp but it is not the same. I learned so much from that list, but it just seems that the times are changing and the mentality of the majority of BtVS fan-vidders are going that way as well. I'm saddened by this - quality is not important, hard work is not emphasized, and apparently getting "hacked off" by someone chopping up your vid and claiming it as their own is just tacky. Telling people the truth is seen as insulting and the height of bad taste and becoming frustrated to answer the same damn question that bonibaru answered three fucking digests ago is just you being superior.
Well, Fuck That. Then I am superior. Shit. If superior means that I actually care about what I do - that I view vidding as an art and craft and taking the time to study and learn that craft is me acting all high and mighty well then look on up, cause there I be. I've been tired and frustrated before, but this is a completely new level. Maybe it is driven by the fact that I feel that I am moving beyond being a BtVS vidder - or at least running out of things to say. Other than a Xander project on hold and "Mission Temple Fireworks Stand" I have no future BtVS projects at all planned. AtS - yeah, I'm up to my eyeballs and armpits in that show and look forward to vidding it for years to come. But branching out - it is a good thing. There is a ton of shit I can do with "Queer as Folk" and I never gave my "Farscape" projects half a chance, really. So, maybe letting go of the group is kinda my way of moving on to other fannish endeavors - growing. Look at me with all the layers.
Also - I won't have to be bitter - which is not that attractive on me - I carry off bitter about as gracefully as Miss Havisham. Now where did I put that old wedding dress...
caphricacorn) and my dog becoming so traumatized by 4th of July fireworks a 1/2 mile away on the 3rd of July that he ran away and hid all night while I searched the perimeter of my parent's farm with a flashlight and Cappy. He is safe and sound now for at least another year , but it was quite the story! Oh - or all about the move and my semi-not-really nervous breakdown that actually turned out to be the bit of drama-queen I haven't grown out of still residing deep with in my psyche. I could tell ya'll about work and how I am now know as the "quiet" one and I sit huddled at my desk and get my job done in 2 hours because it is fucking boring but I still have to be there so I just sit. If the internet wasn't monitored closely, I would be happy. Also - back in a city where going for Mexican food is considered "exotic" - Dear Lord what was I thinking? I could tell ya'll all about J's class reunion and him hooking up with the validictorian (that's my boy - going for brains over brawn. I swear he is so much more complex than me) or about the fact that I really do miss my Memphis people. Even the ones that got on my nerves. I could post about the smoking ban that the city of Lexigton just enacted - no smoking in any public places and how this seems to include not only the Cigar Bar but also the tobacco warehouses (Sorry Mr. Buyer from Brown & Williamson and Mr. Bidder from Philip Morris. Please buy our fabulous burley, but ya gotta go light that up outside). I mean - I understand limiting second-hand smoke and all - but c'mon. Exemptions people. Exemptions.
I could tell ya about the beautiful welcome wagon of the neighborhood boys that showed up on my doorstep last week - Todd and Kendell and apparently they are so pretty they made the apartment brochure. I don't think they even have to pay rent - just show up at various complex parties and say hi to the new people. Very, very pretty. I of course was unable to do more beyond gawking. I can gawk like a pro, though.
Instead I will say this: I love
heres_luck and I love my new icon. It makes me happy. I'll also say that I was at turns enjoying and becoming extremely frustrated with recent events on Nummy Treat. I know I come off as a raging bitch there, so I don't know if any of my posts are taken seriously anymore - but dammit. I take this seriously. And I had to get bitchy - otherwise I would explode - but I want the group back that introduced me to Lum, and here's luck and renenet and Kamil and Jainie and Wendy and well - just about everyone. And it just doesn't look like it is gonna happen. Fuck. I know there is still Boot Camp but it is not the same. I learned so much from that list, but it just seems that the times are changing and the mentality of the majority of BtVS fan-vidders are going that way as well. I'm saddened by this - quality is not important, hard work is not emphasized, and apparently getting "hacked off" by someone chopping up your vid and claiming it as their own is just tacky. Telling people the truth is seen as insulting and the height of bad taste and becoming frustrated to answer the same damn question that bonibaru answered three fucking digests ago is just you being superior. Well, Fuck That. Then I am superior. Shit. If superior means that I actually care about what I do - that I view vidding as an art and craft and taking the time to study and learn that craft is me acting all high and mighty well then look on up, cause there I be. I've been tired and frustrated before, but this is a completely new level. Maybe it is driven by the fact that I feel that I am moving beyond being a BtVS vidder - or at least running out of things to say. Other than a Xander project on hold and "Mission Temple Fireworks Stand" I have no future BtVS projects at all planned. AtS - yeah, I'm up to my eyeballs and armpits in that show and look forward to vidding it for years to come. But branching out - it is a good thing. There is a ton of shit I can do with "Queer as Folk" and I never gave my "Farscape" projects half a chance, really. So, maybe letting go of the group is kinda my way of moving on to other fannish endeavors - growing. Look at me with all the layers.
Also - I won't have to be bitter - which is not that attractive on me - I carry off bitter about as gracefully as Miss Havisham. Now where did I put that old wedding dress...
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Re: groupie icon if anyone wants to use it...
Date: 2003-07-07 04:41 am (UTC)Hmmm... depends on the vid and inspiration and source and free time and all that. I guess my wow-type vid would be "Closer" and that was a project in the works for six months. I wasn't working on it continuously during those six months - but it was something I looked at and thought about constantly. The main trouble was figuring out what the hell it was I wanted to say and I think that comes from forcing it - I wanted to make this vid - but I had no idea what it was about and that was my main hold-up. Other stuff just kinda hits you upside the head and you *know* - like "Cowboy" just took 3 weeks and "Peacemaker" even less time than that.