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The Boy woke me today to do his hair. I think the deal was he would come over and make coffee for me if I would fix his hair since he won a bunch of product in a silent auction at his football banquet.
Or something. So I gave him total Darien-hair. I mean - the kid has a poofy head of hair anyway that gives him an extra 2 inches in height, I just kind of *shaped* his hair.
[Boy looking at hair in mirror, brushing sideburns back]
Me: No, no, no, no! You have to leave the sideburns down and forward. Actually, you need to develop a nervous habit of checking and re-styling your sideburns, like Darien is always doing.
Boy: You realize that no one at my school is going to know who The Invisible Man is.
Me: That's good. They'll think you're an individual.
In other news - I saw "Oceans 11" this weekend. Actually, everyone came over to my teeny apartment to watch it and by everyone I mean Dawn, her boyfriend, and the boy. Somehow, I ended up sitting on the floor, in my own apartment. I really don't know how that happened.
I had never seen Oceans 11:
Me: Whoa. How come no one told me [until recently] how very slashy this movie is?
Dawn: Um...it is a crime caper with eleven guys and one girl and she isn't even in it that much. We thought you knew.
Me: I keep thinking Seth Green or Vin Diesal is in this and then I'm perplexed when they don't show up. I'm all like "But, you can't go yet. Seth isn't there."
In other other news, I have retaken my Vidding Drive. I have deleted 68 gigs of unfinished SV vid clips. I feel really good about this as one of the vids was not working at all and the other is working - just not working hard and needs to be put away. I feel a tremendous relief and hopefully I can focus now on finishing the current vid in progress because that has stalled - I think mainly because instead of watching it obsessively, I am doing Latin homework. That or Christmas Shopping.
Therefore - Lists of Ways to Make My Life Easy or Twelve Things I Have to Do Before Christmas:
1. Update planner. A planner does not work unless you do what is in it and write things down that need to be done. A planner is not an accessory you have just to walk around with and take to meetings. It is not there just so you can pose thoughtfully over it while someone is droning on about Trade-Combined Ratios and your planner is not to be used solely as a place where you can store your doodles of Puppet Angel (otherwise known as notes taken during meeting). Yes, you and your planner do make a smashing couple, but unlike Model Nick, whom you dated in your younger, wilder days, the planner actually has a functional purpose beyond the aesthetic. Talk to your planner. The honeymoon may be over, but it is time for you to forge those bonds of adulthood.
2. Figure out why every outlet (save for the refrigerator, thank god) in the kitchen died this morning. If unable to figure this out - call your freaking landlord. This fear of the man who owns your home is ridiculous and you do this every time you live somewhere. Remember when you were 19 and the garbage disposal quit and you just did without it until the week before you moved when the landlord came over and flipped a switch and it hummed back to life? Remember that it broke 18 months prior to that and you just couldn't bring yourself to bring it up? You paid for a house with a garbage disposal. You could have had a garbage disposal. You need kitchen outlets. Without a microwave you might starve. Call the landlord.
3. Do laundry before it reaches epic levels. Right now it is at nice manageable levels. Gather it up and go to the laundromat and spend 2 hours staying on top of things.
4. Related note: after completing the above task - it would be really nifty if you just went ahead and hung up/put away all the clothes right away. Life is just easier when this happens.
5. Post Office or Die Trying. It is vitally important that you get yourself to the post office by Wednesday. This is your deadline. You will have everything boxed, packaged, envelopes will be addressed and you will be at the post office Wed.
Break it down if it is easier.
Tonight:
a. Set up printer. Print stuff.
b. Wrap what needs wrapping.
c. Address everything. If you don't have the address, make one up. It is the thought that counts, right? Well think it to the right place. Geez.
d. Box to Present ratio - you noticed last night this was off - fix it at lunch. Over buy if necessary. Extra boxes will not kill you.
e. Remember that woman's house from aintitawful.com (or whatever that site was. That link was the scariest thing you have ever seen) and remember that while extra boxes won't kill you, they can take over your life and make you miserable. Vow to not let the boxes win in a test of wills. Sing "We Are the Champions" while disposing of extra boxes if that is what it takes.
Tomorrow:
a. Go to the post office. Beat your deadline by a day. Die of shock.
6. Make a list and check it twice. You are forgetting someone. Don't figure out who it is - just know you are forgetting them and feel terrible. What did they ever do to you to make you forget who they are? Obviously, nothing - as you have no problem remembering the people who piss you off.
7. Think about the people who piss you off. Use this energy to make some necessary cuts in your vid. Pretend the clips are laughing at you.
8. Make a promise that if you are just going to sit in front of your computer and not vid, then you will write. Do something. Sitting is not something.
9. Just go ahead and finalize
sdwolfpup's mix already. At this point you are just moving "Get Right with God" all over the track listing and changing the title of the CD so you can rightfully include that Lucinda Williams song instead of "Joy" which is a much better fit. Rationalize all you want - just go ahead and finish the damned thing already.
10. Listen to "Big Red Boat" a couple dozen times a day. This is your new Christmas song. Make certain you have Seah and Margie's vid cued up and remember to say "God....God....God...not God" and just hope you are right since you don't watch Joan of Arcadia (because you can't remember when it airs - the vid you adore). Congratulate yourself on having a much more appropriate Christmas song this year than, say, when you were ten and your Christmas song was "My Girl Wants to Party All the Time" by Eddie Murphy.
11. Dawn says that December 23 is the new Christmas Eve and we are exchanging presents then. She like made a decree or something. Apparently, she has that kind of power. So adjust everything on this list to occur a day before. Realize that this now means you are totally behind on everything.
12. Freak out! Le freak, C'est Chic
::boogies::
Or something. So I gave him total Darien-hair. I mean - the kid has a poofy head of hair anyway that gives him an extra 2 inches in height, I just kind of *shaped* his hair.
[Boy looking at hair in mirror, brushing sideburns back]
Me: No, no, no, no! You have to leave the sideburns down and forward. Actually, you need to develop a nervous habit of checking and re-styling your sideburns, like Darien is always doing.
Boy: You realize that no one at my school is going to know who The Invisible Man is.
Me: That's good. They'll think you're an individual.
In other news - I saw "Oceans 11" this weekend. Actually, everyone came over to my teeny apartment to watch it and by everyone I mean Dawn, her boyfriend, and the boy. Somehow, I ended up sitting on the floor, in my own apartment. I really don't know how that happened.
I had never seen Oceans 11:
Me: Whoa. How come no one told me [until recently] how very slashy this movie is?
Dawn: Um...it is a crime caper with eleven guys and one girl and she isn't even in it that much. We thought you knew.
Me: I keep thinking Seth Green or Vin Diesal is in this and then I'm perplexed when they don't show up. I'm all like "But, you can't go yet. Seth isn't there."
In other other news, I have retaken my Vidding Drive. I have deleted 68 gigs of unfinished SV vid clips. I feel really good about this as one of the vids was not working at all and the other is working - just not working hard and needs to be put away. I feel a tremendous relief and hopefully I can focus now on finishing the current vid in progress because that has stalled - I think mainly because instead of watching it obsessively, I am doing Latin homework. That or Christmas Shopping.
Therefore - Lists of Ways to Make My Life Easy or Twelve Things I Have to Do Before Christmas:
1. Update planner. A planner does not work unless you do what is in it and write things down that need to be done. A planner is not an accessory you have just to walk around with and take to meetings. It is not there just so you can pose thoughtfully over it while someone is droning on about Trade-Combined Ratios and your planner is not to be used solely as a place where you can store your doodles of Puppet Angel (otherwise known as notes taken during meeting). Yes, you and your planner do make a smashing couple, but unlike Model Nick, whom you dated in your younger, wilder days, the planner actually has a functional purpose beyond the aesthetic. Talk to your planner. The honeymoon may be over, but it is time for you to forge those bonds of adulthood.
2. Figure out why every outlet (save for the refrigerator, thank god) in the kitchen died this morning. If unable to figure this out - call your freaking landlord. This fear of the man who owns your home is ridiculous and you do this every time you live somewhere. Remember when you were 19 and the garbage disposal quit and you just did without it until the week before you moved when the landlord came over and flipped a switch and it hummed back to life? Remember that it broke 18 months prior to that and you just couldn't bring yourself to bring it up? You paid for a house with a garbage disposal. You could have had a garbage disposal. You need kitchen outlets. Without a microwave you might starve. Call the landlord.
3. Do laundry before it reaches epic levels. Right now it is at nice manageable levels. Gather it up and go to the laundromat and spend 2 hours staying on top of things.
4. Related note: after completing the above task - it would be really nifty if you just went ahead and hung up/put away all the clothes right away. Life is just easier when this happens.
5. Post Office or Die Trying. It is vitally important that you get yourself to the post office by Wednesday. This is your deadline. You will have everything boxed, packaged, envelopes will be addressed and you will be at the post office Wed.
Break it down if it is easier.
Tonight:
a. Set up printer. Print stuff.
b. Wrap what needs wrapping.
c. Address everything. If you don't have the address, make one up. It is the thought that counts, right? Well think it to the right place. Geez.
d. Box to Present ratio - you noticed last night this was off - fix it at lunch. Over buy if necessary. Extra boxes will not kill you.
e. Remember that woman's house from aintitawful.com (or whatever that site was. That link was the scariest thing you have ever seen) and remember that while extra boxes won't kill you, they can take over your life and make you miserable. Vow to not let the boxes win in a test of wills. Sing "We Are the Champions" while disposing of extra boxes if that is what it takes.
Tomorrow:
a. Go to the post office. Beat your deadline by a day. Die of shock.
6. Make a list and check it twice. You are forgetting someone. Don't figure out who it is - just know you are forgetting them and feel terrible. What did they ever do to you to make you forget who they are? Obviously, nothing - as you have no problem remembering the people who piss you off.
7. Think about the people who piss you off. Use this energy to make some necessary cuts in your vid. Pretend the clips are laughing at you.
8. Make a promise that if you are just going to sit in front of your computer and not vid, then you will write. Do something. Sitting is not something.
9. Just go ahead and finalize
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
10. Listen to "Big Red Boat" a couple dozen times a day. This is your new Christmas song. Make certain you have Seah and Margie's vid cued up and remember to say "God....God....God...not God" and just hope you are right since you don't watch Joan of Arcadia (because you can't remember when it airs - the vid you adore). Congratulate yourself on having a much more appropriate Christmas song this year than, say, when you were ten and your Christmas song was "My Girl Wants to Party All the Time" by Eddie Murphy.
11. Dawn says that December 23 is the new Christmas Eve and we are exchanging presents then. She like made a decree or something. Apparently, she has that kind of power. So adjust everything on this list to occur a day before. Realize that this now means you are totally behind on everything.
12. Freak out! Le freak, C'est Chic
::boogies::
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 03:45 pm (UTC)I have a guilty secret. I buy a couple of pretty, fairly expensive Christmas ornaments and stick them in those pretty bags. Then if someone I didn't buy a gift shows up with something, I say, "Oh! Yours is downstairs!" and run and grab one of the ornaments.
The past few years that I have done this, I have forgotten no one, but it's always easy to figure out what to do with extra ornaments.
Also--my house is taken over both by boxes and things that should be in the boxes and aren't. I don't visualize this changing in the foreseeable future.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 03:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 03:53 pm (UTC)That's the best idea EVER. I'm so doing that when I'm properly grown up and have money to buy ornaments. I just give them (slightly burned or otherwise mutilated looking) baked goods and smile charmingly.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 05:33 pm (UTC)May have to start doing the ornament thing too....
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 03:52 pm (UTC)Is it possible everything but the fridge is one circuit, and all you need to do is flip the circuit breaker?
Signed,
Someone who thought all the lights in the kitchen were broken after I moved in, because I flipped the circuit breaker and it didn't help, and I didn't realize one stack of boxes was blocking the *light switch*.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 04:04 pm (UTC)Someone who thought all the lights in the kitchen were broken after I moved in, because I flipped the circuit breaker and it didn't help, and I didn't realize one stack of boxes was blocking the *light switch*.
See, I am worried it is something like this because there are several switches in my apartment that have no discernable function. At least 3. So I am worried that it is something simple like that, except this morning the power in the outlets went out while The Boy was standing in front of the microwave, cooking frozen french toast. He swears he didn't touch anything, that everything just died.
We finally moved the toaster to the front room so I could have breakfast. Thank God the coffee was already made.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 07:51 pm (UTC)From Mom
Date: 2004-12-13 09:15 pm (UTC)Re: From Mom
Date: 2004-12-13 09:56 pm (UTC)Hey - are you retired yet?
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 03:57 pm (UTC)That movie's Knockaround Guys. It too has the Cosmic Sees Slash Seal of Approval, even though it doesn't get the Whee! I want to be a criminal, too! That looks like fun! Seal of Approval that Ocean's 11 has.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 04:01 pm (UTC)Yes! I kept thinking during the movie that this looks like a blast, this knocking over a Casino. I had to keep reminding myself that once the heist is over, bad things tend to happen ala "Goodfellas"
Another thing that occurred to me: Watching this movie would be the biggest theft-trigger ever for Darien (of I-Man). It would be like me and cigarettes and watching a Denis Leary Special.
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 04:20 pm (UTC)*laughs!* So very true.
And after seeing that movie (which he's seen, let's face it, many, many, many times), Darien will always be all, "Let's go to Vegas," and bounce around the walls for days. And more than once, Hobbes has had to stop be from actually going out and stealing something, so Bobby Hobbes? He hates that movie. So very much.
-theendofministory
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 04:38 pm (UTC)::working my story into your story::
no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 11:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 04:18 pm (UTC)It's not quite as "tight" -- it's bigger, broader than the first one, but it's just as slashy, especially with regard to Danny and Rusty. On the surface, they're all about their girls, but peel back a layer, and it's clear that they're really all about each other.
little red button
Date: 2004-12-13 05:06 pm (UTC)Re: little red button
Date: 2004-12-13 09:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 08:24 pm (UTC)from mom
Date: 2004-12-13 09:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-12-13 10:58 pm (UTC)