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One Word is Worth a Thousand, er, Words.
May. 18th, 2005 11:37 amI was taken aback the other day reading Neil Gaiman's blog when he remarked that he had never heard the word "Goodness!" used as an exclamation and I was glad to see that several people wrote in on the subject.
Just so you know - I hear "Goodness" all the time, mostly from mothers of young children who used to say something completely different before their kids started parroting their words, or from elderly people or... well, hell - I use it, too. I mean, I can't talk the way I normally do with clients and so you have to have a way of expressing shock and sympathy as most of my people have been through an ordeal.
But the word can mean many different things, depending on intonation. My most common use of it is as "My goodness!" with the appropriate hand over the heart and expression of disbelief. The correct interpretation of this is "No shit?" unless I lean toward the speaker which denotes "Awwww, no shit?" which is very similar but forges a more emotional connection. This can be used to describe a reaction to a myriad of situations but most often one where you are commiserating with a fellow human over the miserable behavior of another, somewhat, human.
Example:
Client: I told her I didn't care if she called the po-lice, I's getting back in my car and taking my momma on and so's she jumped up and started wailing on the quarter panel with her keys. So I restrained her an' all and that is when she kicked the fender and the car jess went down the embankment into the crik.
Me: My goodness!
Now, it can also mean other things as well. "Goodness" alone can, when used with the proper arch expression and tilt of a chin, mean "You fucking bastard, I hate you. I don't believe you. You are beneath me and You will always be beneath me and did I mention that you were scum? And that your mother is a whore? I am certain I mentioned that but I am reiterating that again, just for clarity's sake. Also? You suck" Now - I am certain that anyone can squeeze a certain amount of that meaning out of this single word with practice, but to get the whole she-bang, you really have to be Southern since it is kinda taught to you from birth on up. Seriously, do not fuck with a Southern woman in a battle of words cause she just will not need as many as you do. Trust me. They are like jackyls and they get this gleam in their eyes and a lot of these ladies' only fulfillment in life comes from *this* so just... Avoid the Junior League. My advice to you, do with it what you will.
Example:
Stupid Fucker: Hey, Liz - I am so sorry I flaked on dinner with your folks but me and Dave were at the river festival and then there were these cops and I knew you didn't have bail money so I called Face instead.
Me [on telephone at work, surrounded by clients]: Goodness!
See? See how that works? Goodness will never go out of style as long as there is so much that can be done with it.
Just so you know - I hear "Goodness" all the time, mostly from mothers of young children who used to say something completely different before their kids started parroting their words, or from elderly people or... well, hell - I use it, too. I mean, I can't talk the way I normally do with clients and so you have to have a way of expressing shock and sympathy as most of my people have been through an ordeal.
But the word can mean many different things, depending on intonation. My most common use of it is as "My goodness!" with the appropriate hand over the heart and expression of disbelief. The correct interpretation of this is "No shit?" unless I lean toward the speaker which denotes "Awwww, no shit?" which is very similar but forges a more emotional connection. This can be used to describe a reaction to a myriad of situations but most often one where you are commiserating with a fellow human over the miserable behavior of another, somewhat, human.
Example:
Client: I told her I didn't care if she called the po-lice, I's getting back in my car and taking my momma on and so's she jumped up and started wailing on the quarter panel with her keys. So I restrained her an' all and that is when she kicked the fender and the car jess went down the embankment into the crik.
Me: My goodness!
Now, it can also mean other things as well. "Goodness" alone can, when used with the proper arch expression and tilt of a chin, mean "You fucking bastard, I hate you. I don't believe you. You are beneath me and You will always be beneath me and did I mention that you were scum? And that your mother is a whore? I am certain I mentioned that but I am reiterating that again, just for clarity's sake. Also? You suck" Now - I am certain that anyone can squeeze a certain amount of that meaning out of this single word with practice, but to get the whole she-bang, you really have to be Southern since it is kinda taught to you from birth on up. Seriously, do not fuck with a Southern woman in a battle of words cause she just will not need as many as you do. Trust me. They are like jackyls and they get this gleam in their eyes and a lot of these ladies' only fulfillment in life comes from *this* so just... Avoid the Junior League. My advice to you, do with it what you will.
Example:
Stupid Fucker: Hey, Liz - I am so sorry I flaked on dinner with your folks but me and Dave were at the river festival and then there were these cops and I knew you didn't have bail money so I called Face instead.
Me [on telephone at work, surrounded by clients]: Goodness!
See? See how that works? Goodness will never go out of style as long as there is so much that can be done with it.
