sisabet

So I'm watching S2 all the way through in order and the state of me is pretty much this:

1. I love Eberts
2. I adore Eberts
3. When can I have an Eberts of my very own? He goes with Puppet Angel. They sing duets together. In my head, it is a beautiful (and educational) thing.
4. Eberts!!!

Now that I got that out of my system, I do have this to say about the introduction of Alex Monroe: I was right - they are trying to Miss Parker her into the series. They even address her as Miss Monroe when clearly she is Special Agent Monroe or Agent Monroe. No one ever calls Bobby, Mr. Hobbes. No it is Agent Hobbes or Agent Fawkes or just their last names. So the only explanation for "Miss"ing Alex is they really have a hard on for Miss Parker. Except she isn't Miss Parker and even if she was - she wouldn't fit here. Darien is the Invisible Man - not the Pretender, which IMO is a very good thing.

So, I have Alex issues - I only like her when she is being nice to Bobby and that isn't very often and I could care less about her baby. Seriously, the baby-plot is boring and makes less sense then Scully and her baby. Also - why is it always babies? Is it cause the writers decide that women have uteruses and if they don't take advantage of the fact then they are missing out on a primo story-telling arc? Because - history shows us that they are just wrong - babies written into established shows rarely work and are almost always written out. Okay - let me make a clarification: established (past the first season) genre shows (and also Melrose Place).

Can you think of a kid that ever stuck around in baby form? Connor, William Scully, Xena got rid of babies through super-aging at least twice, um... Vincent and Catherine's kid on "Beauty and the Beast" and WTF was up with that? and I am certain there are more - OH!! Max and Tessa's kid on "Roswell" - even if the show hadn't been cancelled there was no way he was gonna be a teenage alien daddy - because who wants to watch that?

Babies just don't work on these shows except as a temporary plot device or for drama during a pregnancy. Actual babies are cute and helpless and boring as hell when you are battling the forces of evil, the apocolypse or trying to defend the planet. They get in the way. Ask Angel - he used to train to fight while holding Connor. I actually kind of liked that - it gave me a happy. But Dawn and I both agreed that Connor was such a sweet baby, that there would come a point when he was two or three where he would say or do something just so incredibly adorable that Angel would lose his soul in that moment. There really was no escaping it. So good thing Vampire Dad didn't raise the kid - in the long run. Well -actually, Connor was just fucked no matter what - and the wheres and the hows of what could have happened to Connor were pretty wide open except for one thing: there is no way he is staying a baby on that show. Either he is being given up for adoption, aged incredibly fast, kidnapped, or killed - no way are we watching a kid grow up. It just doesn't happen.

So you know this ahead of time, and if you are me, you watch the baby-scenes (well - except for Connor - I fell for him, but that was Angel's Baby so it was different) kinda bored cause it is all just killing time until the baby goes away. Why even bother? We know where it is going and why be predictable.

So this is why baby-plots bore me. I want to grab the people who make these decisions and shake them and ask if they have truly thought this through. These kids are just nothing more than pure angst-plot devices designed to make the lead cry or learn and grow ("Look at the Princess" anyone? Buellar?) and most of the time are never mentioned again.

Oh unless we get a "Heard about you giving up the baby, Scully. That must have sucked" from Mulder and then we get a weepy Scully, "Oh, Mulder, I thought you would be so angry!!" and I am not lying when I say to you - a small part of me died with that.

::so bitter::

I guess my deal is - keep the young'uns out of my shows unless you are prepared to do something different. Or make the kid evil, cause I always like that. Kids are kinda creepy anyway, so it really works for me.

I'm loosely quoting characters in the subject line, because I ran out of ideas for this post.
* Eberts!
** Rube -- "Dead Like Me"