More Qafness stuff
Nov. 11th, 2003 10:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sisabetSo here is a bit more of the fic-like thing that is most definitely not a fic.
QaF us and if it was a fic, I would say that it is set after season 3 and could potentially contain spoilers up to 3x14.
One Week 2/?
And we are back from commercial break. I would like to take this time to thank our kind sponsors, Dekuyper’s Butterscotch Schnapps and Orville Redenbacher. Without their continued support, this would not be possible.
Saturday: Day One Continued
The scene at the loft is grim. Ben sits on a barstool in stunned disbelief. Brian-in-Michael’s body has just kind of collapsed on the futon cushion and lays there sprawled out, occasionally holding up his hand and flexing it thoughtfully. Michael-in-Brian’s body has been pacing restlessly the better part of an hour. Justin sits at his computer chair. His expression ranges between shell-shocked and confused and he just looks around the room aimlessly. Brian thinks he has never looked more like Jennifer Taylor in his entire life.
Brian stands up and walks over and sits on the desk beside Justin. “Well, now that we are all in agreement that something is seriously fucked up here, I just want to know what the hell we are going to do to fix this.”
“Fix this!” Michael stops his pacing to glare at Brian, “How the hell are we supposed to fix this?”
“Well, I don’t know Mikey, otherwise I probably would not be here. Wait. Correction. This is my house. You and your happy hubby would not be here, you would be having a lovely morning playing house with the brat. Christ, you probably watch cartoons together.”
Ben stands up, holding his palms out “I don’t think you two bickering right now is going to accomplish anything. We need to just…”
“What,” Justin says suddenly, “We need to just..what? How the hell did this happen? This is not supposed to happen…” Justin’s voice trails off weakly as if he forgot what he was going to say.
“Well, look who has a knack for stating the obvious,” Michael snarked approaching Justin. “It has happened. How are we going to fix it?”
Michael in Brian’s body is directly in front of Justin now. Justin looks up at Michael, looks away and then focuses his gaze on Michael’s chest. Justin’s face slackens a bit and he starts to lick his lips.
“Hey!” Brian yells, swatting at Justin’s head. “Stop that.”
“I can’t help it!” Justin looks around the room, searching for understanding, “It’s like this ingrained response.”
Brian looks sympathetically at Justin, and then at Michael, “Yeah. I get that. I’d fuck me.”
Michael and Ben just gape at Brian.
“What? You were expecting me to have a different reaction?”
Ben sits back down on the barstool and says, “Look, we need to approach this thing constructively, try to deduce what exactly has happened here and just figure this thing out.”
“The last thing I remember last night was getting up after you fell asleep for a snack.”
“Well, that’s good Michael, yes – we should retrace what both of you remember just before you fell asleep,” Ben replies hopefully, “There may be some kind of connection. What did you eat?”
“I had a glass of milk and some left-over peach pie that Mom sent over.”
“Okay, well that is something interesting, Brian – did you eat anything last night?”
Brian barks out a short laugh, “What, you mean other than him?” He jerks his thumb in Justin’s direction. “Puh-leeze.”
“No, Brian, this could be important, what is the last thing you remember before falling asleep last night,” Justin finally looks a bit more focused.
Brian takes a deep breath, “Um, let’s see – I think it is you blowing me over on the stairs.”
”No, wait – I blew you first and then you fucked me on the platform.”
”Was that before I fucked you? No, I’m pretty certain I fucked you and then you blew me on the platform.”
“No, you blew me in kitchen and then I blew you on the stairs, then you rimmed me and the fucked me on the platform next to the bed.”
“Huh. I seem to remember fucking in the bed.”
“Oh! You’re right!” Justin pops up excited now, “You rolled over last night and woke me up so I woke you up and we fucked, it must have been around 3 or something.” Justin looks around proudly, as if piecing together the order of the sex will somehow fix everything. “And then around 5 am, I woke up again and decided….” Justin looks over at Michael and trails off, sitting back down again.
“As fascinating as your marathon fuck sessions are to me, I don’t know that it has anything to do with this,” Michael begins.
“Wait,” Brian starts to grin. “Around 5 what? I seem to remember at 5 this morning, I was huddled in the bathroom clutching Michael’s wiener.” Brian leans over and sneers in Justin’s face, “Just what were you clutching, Sunshine?”
“Look,” Ben interrupts, “I don’t want us to get off track here.”
“No, no, I totally understand,” Brian says innocently. “I am gaining an entire new respect for my body.” Brian watches Michael appreciatively, Justin groans and lays his head in his hands. “I am pretty damned irresistible.”
Ben continues as if Brian is not talking, directing his question to Justin, “We got home from Babylon a little after 2. Did you two go anywhere at all last night?”
“No,” Justin shook his head emphatically, “I got here around 10 last night and Brian was already pretty wasted, so we decided to stay in.”
”Seems to me that I had every intention of going to Babylon and someone kept distracting me from getting dressed.”
“Maybe that’s it,” Michael begins to get excited, “I was at Babylon last night and you were wanting to be at Babylon and maybe there was something off, like in the gravitational pull of the Earth or magnetic forces and we swapped essences!”
Brian stares at Michael, “Yeah, and maybe as children we were both exposed to intense red gamma rays and now we have superpowers unless we see the color red. Oh! Or maybe you aren’t even human at all, Michael, maybe Deb found you in a spaceship outside of the house when she was seventeen and just decided to keep you because she is all wacky like that. Maybe this is the manifestation of your secret alien power. Therefore it stands to reason that you can switch us back at any time.”
“At least I am trying to make sense of this. And before you mock my ideas, I’d like to remind you that we switched bodies. I think we have passed far-fetched and are entering bizarro-land here.”
“Actually.” Justin muses thoughtfully, “Debbie would probably keep the little alien baby she found.”
Michael stares at Justin, “Not. Helping.”
“Brian,” Ben asks, “Is this a possibility, did you want to got to Babylon last night?”
Brian sighs, “Actually, I probably only thought about it once.”
“Well, that’s something, and what did you think?”
Brian looks thoughtful, “Well, I was ramming my cock up his, “ jerk of thumb toward Justin, “ass and I remember thinking ‘I don’t think I’m gonna make it to Babylon tonight.’”
Hours pass like this. Michael continues to pace around the loft and after a while Justin begins to track him. Brian doesn’t even think he is conscious that he is doing it, so he has to nudge him and make a comment about what a hot number his body is. After a while Brian just can’t stop laughing because Justin is so fucking funny about this. Once Brian begins musing loudly that if he (meaning Brian) and Mikey were to fuck right now it would be nothing more than really intense masturbation, Ben has had enough.
“Okay,” he says, looking around the loft. “We are resolving nothing and I think we need to make some plans.”
“Plans?” Michael says weakly.
“Yes. We need to know what we are going to do, how we are going to handle this – until we can figure out how to get you two back in the right place.”
Michael finally sits down on the futon cushion.
“Look, I know that you are upset, but we need to think about Hunter. Given his rather obvious crush on Brian, this could be very confusing to him. Not to mention that he already has issues about abandonment”
“Oh, I am not going home and playing ‘Leave It to Beaver’ with you and the tiniest hustler,” Brian protests
“Brian, no one ever expects you to go anywhere near a beaver,” Justin snorts and Brian flashes him an appreciative grin. Perhaps Justin is going to be all right with this after all. Or maybe not, as Justin quickly looks away from Brian’s smile.
“Remember we were discussing a camping trip for next week. I’m off until the summer session starts up. I’ll just go home and tell Hunter that you have to work at the store, but I am in need of some serious communing with nature time and he is coming with me.”
“He’ll have a fit,” Michael says quietly
“He’ll go and it will be good for him. I just don’t know about leaving you…”
Michael looks up quickly, “No, you should go. Hunter has been through enough and there is no guarantee he’ll even believe we haven’t lost our minds.”
“That’s not it,” Ben looks a little lost. “Michael, I’d like to talk to you, privately, “ He says the last part with a bit of an apology to Brian and Justin.
Brian sweeps an arm out in no particular direction, “Have at it.”
Michael and Ben walk over to the window and begin murmuring lowly to each other. They stand very close together, but do not touch.
Justin begins fidgeting next to Brian. “I should call Emmett.”
“Why?”
“Well, he’s Emmett. He’s from Mississippi and maybe he knows about that voodoo shit.”
Brian laughs, “I don’t really think that Emmett is well-versed in ‘that voodoo shit’”
“Well, it can’t hurt to ask”
Ten minutes later, Michael and Ben are waving their goodbyes (“What, no goodbye kiss?” Brian snarks in falsetto) and the four are now down to three.
“So what did Emmett, say? Does he think you are crazy?” Michael asks eagerly
“No. He believed me immediately. It was strange.” Justin shakes his head. “He said that he’ll see us all tomorrow, he’d come over tonight, but he and Vic have this big party that they are giving…” Justin trails off again, trying to remember to not look at Michael. But then that leaves Brian for Justin to look at and that appears to freak him out more.
“I gotta go” Justin is grabbing his bag and grabbing things off his desk as he practically runs for the door, “I’ve, um, got this project due and…” Justin bolts out of the door.
Brian yells after him, “You aren’t even in fucking school!”
"God. I am so antsy. I feel like my skin is crawling" Michael tells Brian.
"Really?"
"Yeah, I feel like I need something, maybe a drink?" Michael walks over to the liquor cabinet.
"Well, that solves that."
"Solves what"
"I was wondering if that was psychological or physical."
QaF us and if it was a fic, I would say that it is set after season 3 and could potentially contain spoilers up to 3x14.
One Week 2/?
And we are back from commercial break. I would like to take this time to thank our kind sponsors, Dekuyper’s Butterscotch Schnapps and Orville Redenbacher. Without their continued support, this would not be possible.
Saturday: Day One Continued
The scene at the loft is grim. Ben sits on a barstool in stunned disbelief. Brian-in-Michael’s body has just kind of collapsed on the futon cushion and lays there sprawled out, occasionally holding up his hand and flexing it thoughtfully. Michael-in-Brian’s body has been pacing restlessly the better part of an hour. Justin sits at his computer chair. His expression ranges between shell-shocked and confused and he just looks around the room aimlessly. Brian thinks he has never looked more like Jennifer Taylor in his entire life.
Brian stands up and walks over and sits on the desk beside Justin. “Well, now that we are all in agreement that something is seriously fucked up here, I just want to know what the hell we are going to do to fix this.”
“Fix this!” Michael stops his pacing to glare at Brian, “How the hell are we supposed to fix this?”
“Well, I don’t know Mikey, otherwise I probably would not be here. Wait. Correction. This is my house. You and your happy hubby would not be here, you would be having a lovely morning playing house with the brat. Christ, you probably watch cartoons together.”
Ben stands up, holding his palms out “I don’t think you two bickering right now is going to accomplish anything. We need to just…”
“What,” Justin says suddenly, “We need to just..what? How the hell did this happen? This is not supposed to happen…” Justin’s voice trails off weakly as if he forgot what he was going to say.
“Well, look who has a knack for stating the obvious,” Michael snarked approaching Justin. “It has happened. How are we going to fix it?”
Michael in Brian’s body is directly in front of Justin now. Justin looks up at Michael, looks away and then focuses his gaze on Michael’s chest. Justin’s face slackens a bit and he starts to lick his lips.
“Hey!” Brian yells, swatting at Justin’s head. “Stop that.”
“I can’t help it!” Justin looks around the room, searching for understanding, “It’s like this ingrained response.”
Brian looks sympathetically at Justin, and then at Michael, “Yeah. I get that. I’d fuck me.”
Michael and Ben just gape at Brian.
“What? You were expecting me to have a different reaction?”
Ben sits back down on the barstool and says, “Look, we need to approach this thing constructively, try to deduce what exactly has happened here and just figure this thing out.”
“The last thing I remember last night was getting up after you fell asleep for a snack.”
“Well, that’s good Michael, yes – we should retrace what both of you remember just before you fell asleep,” Ben replies hopefully, “There may be some kind of connection. What did you eat?”
“I had a glass of milk and some left-over peach pie that Mom sent over.”
“Okay, well that is something interesting, Brian – did you eat anything last night?”
Brian barks out a short laugh, “What, you mean other than him?” He jerks his thumb in Justin’s direction. “Puh-leeze.”
“No, Brian, this could be important, what is the last thing you remember before falling asleep last night,” Justin finally looks a bit more focused.
Brian takes a deep breath, “Um, let’s see – I think it is you blowing me over on the stairs.”
”No, wait – I blew you first and then you fucked me on the platform.”
”Was that before I fucked you? No, I’m pretty certain I fucked you and then you blew me on the platform.”
“No, you blew me in kitchen and then I blew you on the stairs, then you rimmed me and the fucked me on the platform next to the bed.”
“Huh. I seem to remember fucking in the bed.”
“Oh! You’re right!” Justin pops up excited now, “You rolled over last night and woke me up so I woke you up and we fucked, it must have been around 3 or something.” Justin looks around proudly, as if piecing together the order of the sex will somehow fix everything. “And then around 5 am, I woke up again and decided….” Justin looks over at Michael and trails off, sitting back down again.
“As fascinating as your marathon fuck sessions are to me, I don’t know that it has anything to do with this,” Michael begins.
“Wait,” Brian starts to grin. “Around 5 what? I seem to remember at 5 this morning, I was huddled in the bathroom clutching Michael’s wiener.” Brian leans over and sneers in Justin’s face, “Just what were you clutching, Sunshine?”
“Look,” Ben interrupts, “I don’t want us to get off track here.”
“No, no, I totally understand,” Brian says innocently. “I am gaining an entire new respect for my body.” Brian watches Michael appreciatively, Justin groans and lays his head in his hands. “I am pretty damned irresistible.”
Ben continues as if Brian is not talking, directing his question to Justin, “We got home from Babylon a little after 2. Did you two go anywhere at all last night?”
“No,” Justin shook his head emphatically, “I got here around 10 last night and Brian was already pretty wasted, so we decided to stay in.”
”Seems to me that I had every intention of going to Babylon and someone kept distracting me from getting dressed.”
“Maybe that’s it,” Michael begins to get excited, “I was at Babylon last night and you were wanting to be at Babylon and maybe there was something off, like in the gravitational pull of the Earth or magnetic forces and we swapped essences!”
Brian stares at Michael, “Yeah, and maybe as children we were both exposed to intense red gamma rays and now we have superpowers unless we see the color red. Oh! Or maybe you aren’t even human at all, Michael, maybe Deb found you in a spaceship outside of the house when she was seventeen and just decided to keep you because she is all wacky like that. Maybe this is the manifestation of your secret alien power. Therefore it stands to reason that you can switch us back at any time.”
“At least I am trying to make sense of this. And before you mock my ideas, I’d like to remind you that we switched bodies. I think we have passed far-fetched and are entering bizarro-land here.”
“Actually.” Justin muses thoughtfully, “Debbie would probably keep the little alien baby she found.”
Michael stares at Justin, “Not. Helping.”
“Brian,” Ben asks, “Is this a possibility, did you want to got to Babylon last night?”
Brian sighs, “Actually, I probably only thought about it once.”
“Well, that’s something, and what did you think?”
Brian looks thoughtful, “Well, I was ramming my cock up his, “ jerk of thumb toward Justin, “ass and I remember thinking ‘I don’t think I’m gonna make it to Babylon tonight.’”
Hours pass like this. Michael continues to pace around the loft and after a while Justin begins to track him. Brian doesn’t even think he is conscious that he is doing it, so he has to nudge him and make a comment about what a hot number his body is. After a while Brian just can’t stop laughing because Justin is so fucking funny about this. Once Brian begins musing loudly that if he (meaning Brian) and Mikey were to fuck right now it would be nothing more than really intense masturbation, Ben has had enough.
“Okay,” he says, looking around the loft. “We are resolving nothing and I think we need to make some plans.”
“Plans?” Michael says weakly.
“Yes. We need to know what we are going to do, how we are going to handle this – until we can figure out how to get you two back in the right place.”
Michael finally sits down on the futon cushion.
“Look, I know that you are upset, but we need to think about Hunter. Given his rather obvious crush on Brian, this could be very confusing to him. Not to mention that he already has issues about abandonment”
“Oh, I am not going home and playing ‘Leave It to Beaver’ with you and the tiniest hustler,” Brian protests
“Brian, no one ever expects you to go anywhere near a beaver,” Justin snorts and Brian flashes him an appreciative grin. Perhaps Justin is going to be all right with this after all. Or maybe not, as Justin quickly looks away from Brian’s smile.
“Remember we were discussing a camping trip for next week. I’m off until the summer session starts up. I’ll just go home and tell Hunter that you have to work at the store, but I am in need of some serious communing with nature time and he is coming with me.”
“He’ll have a fit,” Michael says quietly
“He’ll go and it will be good for him. I just don’t know about leaving you…”
Michael looks up quickly, “No, you should go. Hunter has been through enough and there is no guarantee he’ll even believe we haven’t lost our minds.”
“That’s not it,” Ben looks a little lost. “Michael, I’d like to talk to you, privately, “ He says the last part with a bit of an apology to Brian and Justin.
Brian sweeps an arm out in no particular direction, “Have at it.”
Michael and Ben walk over to the window and begin murmuring lowly to each other. They stand very close together, but do not touch.
Justin begins fidgeting next to Brian. “I should call Emmett.”
“Why?”
“Well, he’s Emmett. He’s from Mississippi and maybe he knows about that voodoo shit.”
Brian laughs, “I don’t really think that Emmett is well-versed in ‘that voodoo shit’”
“Well, it can’t hurt to ask”
Ten minutes later, Michael and Ben are waving their goodbyes (“What, no goodbye kiss?” Brian snarks in falsetto) and the four are now down to three.
“So what did Emmett, say? Does he think you are crazy?” Michael asks eagerly
“No. He believed me immediately. It was strange.” Justin shakes his head. “He said that he’ll see us all tomorrow, he’d come over tonight, but he and Vic have this big party that they are giving…” Justin trails off again, trying to remember to not look at Michael. But then that leaves Brian for Justin to look at and that appears to freak him out more.
“I gotta go” Justin is grabbing his bag and grabbing things off his desk as he practically runs for the door, “I’ve, um, got this project due and…” Justin bolts out of the door.
Brian yells after him, “You aren’t even in fucking school!”
"God. I am so antsy. I feel like my skin is crawling" Michael tells Brian.
"Really?"
"Yeah, I feel like I need something, maybe a drink?" Michael walks over to the liquor cabinet.
"Well, that solves that."
"Solves what"
"I was wondering if that was psychological or physical."
