Lessons Learned From Rocky I to Rocky III
Jun. 16th, 2006 10:35 amDearest Flobee-Wan - congratulations and all that on your day of metamorphasis or something. I am proud and impressed and an original member of your dissertation fandom.
I have had 20 hours sleep in the past two days. It has been fantastic! I've worked 16 hours in the past two days. I am all freaked out at the utter luxury of it all. My job is...challenging and frustrating and really really insane making and kinda crazy and people are not valued and the pay is ridiculous and the chances of being physically injured are pretty much 100% and the chances of being cussed out or yelled at are more than 100% and it uses up everything I have and everything I might potentially have and I am constantly stretching and running (literally - the campus is quite large and emergencies can happen all over and I have to respond) just to keep afloat and... I kinda love it. I am taking steps to make sure I don't get burned out(see working normalish hours and plenty of sleep above) but even still, I am really really, almost scarily, happy doing what I do.
And only part of it is because I get to spend part of my day deciding if my command style is like that of John Sheppard or if I got all my tips on leadership from Rodney and I am well assured I am not Elizabeth Weir because I cannot raise just the one eyebrow (try as I might). These people at my new job? They have put me in charge. Sometimes I am in charge of the ENTIRE campus. I give orders! People do not always follow them but then I discovered the beauty (whereas before it was a burden) of writing people up! I still feel bad sometimes - unless they did something really really stupid. People? Can be really really stupid.
I have had some freakouts while vidding that I am no longer able to do this - make vids. Well, make vids like I have in the past. I think part of my problem is that before, when I worked as an adjuster, so much of me was stifled all day that it just had to come out somewhere. Now, I have to be really creative all day long. It isn't just a little bit creative - I've got to always be on my toes cause these girls adapt and figure out way too much way too fast and I have to watch them and try to stay ahead of them because if I fall behind then it will be DAYS of flat out running just to catch up. So when I sit in front of Premiere, I feel sorta used up in the deep existential way. I think it is time for me to fully explore my Fluff Period. Vids about pretty people who do crazy or wacky or pretty things. That is me, now.
As far as fandom goes - I am soooo behind on all of my emails and LKBV emails especially. I am hopefully off work this weekend (although I do have to go in for a bit and lead a group) so I have that on the list of things to do. I am still not reading LJ because I am not totally convinced I can do that and NOT lose all my free time. Maybe soon? It is a slippery, slippery slope.
I have had 20 hours sleep in the past two days. It has been fantastic! I've worked 16 hours in the past two days. I am all freaked out at the utter luxury of it all. My job is...challenging and frustrating and really really insane making and kinda crazy and people are not valued and the pay is ridiculous and the chances of being physically injured are pretty much 100% and the chances of being cussed out or yelled at are more than 100% and it uses up everything I have and everything I might potentially have and I am constantly stretching and running (literally - the campus is quite large and emergencies can happen all over and I have to respond) just to keep afloat and... I kinda love it. I am taking steps to make sure I don't get burned out(see working normalish hours and plenty of sleep above) but even still, I am really really, almost scarily, happy doing what I do.
And only part of it is because I get to spend part of my day deciding if my command style is like that of John Sheppard or if I got all my tips on leadership from Rodney and I am well assured I am not Elizabeth Weir because I cannot raise just the one eyebrow (try as I might). These people at my new job? They have put me in charge. Sometimes I am in charge of the ENTIRE campus. I give orders! People do not always follow them but then I discovered the beauty (whereas before it was a burden) of writing people up! I still feel bad sometimes - unless they did something really really stupid. People? Can be really really stupid.
I have had some freakouts while vidding that I am no longer able to do this - make vids. Well, make vids like I have in the past. I think part of my problem is that before, when I worked as an adjuster, so much of me was stifled all day that it just had to come out somewhere. Now, I have to be really creative all day long. It isn't just a little bit creative - I've got to always be on my toes cause these girls adapt and figure out way too much way too fast and I have to watch them and try to stay ahead of them because if I fall behind then it will be DAYS of flat out running just to catch up. So when I sit in front of Premiere, I feel sorta used up in the deep existential way. I think it is time for me to fully explore my Fluff Period. Vids about pretty people who do crazy or wacky or pretty things. That is me, now.
As far as fandom goes - I am soooo behind on all of my emails and LKBV emails especially. I am hopefully off work this weekend (although I do have to go in for a bit and lead a group) so I have that on the list of things to do. I am still not reading LJ because I am not totally convinced I can do that and NOT lose all my free time. Maybe soon? It is a slippery, slippery slope.