Today Is a Day

To everyone that was concerned about me this weekend - I am okay and am actually trying not to be guilty for being okay and while it is harder then it sounds, it isn't impossible. I thought it was and it really really wasn't and now I am also trying not to be guilty about that.

Because, y'know, I've done/am doing so many things in my life that deserve and need my guilt where the guilt is an actual proactive, useful thing that it just makes sense to concentrate on those things.

Grief can be a practical thing.

I spent part of the weekend with my family. My mother is currently complaining that I curse to much in my LJ. I think her words were something along the lines of "I just can't read your journal at all anymore. I mean, THE LANGUAGE, Elizabeth!"

I was a little shocked she was stil trying to read this thing. I thought she gave up on LJ when drdawn became Brian Kinney. I tried to explain to her that this is my journal, that I use it as an outlet and therefore if I am censoring myself here for her consideration, then the whole outlet deal becomes moot. I shoulda also explained how much money I am saving by using this instead of therapy. Damn - hindsight - 20/20 - and all that. I did explain that yes - I do tend to curse much much more now in my LJ than before and most of that is because I tend to post while at work and I am often having to stifle so much in the office that it has to come out somewhere.

I mean - just last week - I come to work dressed in a wool knee length black skirt, a sweater and a pair of very conservative knee high black boots. Skirt boots. They are very nice. My mother bought them for me for Christmas and the weather has changed and we are offically in fall and if I want to wear boots now I have every wardrobe and seasonal right to wear boots. And a co-worker walked past me and said "Oh Liz, I see you are wearing your hooker boots today."

And I did not murder her. I think we can all see how useful this LJ really is - and my filthy language.

Also - I happen to own hooker boots - purchased with drdawn while I was in high school and post-Pretty Woman. Those boots, well those boots made me VERY popular Junior Year, but I ain't prancing around the office in 'em.

Maybe I should?


Well - just in case Mom is reading this now - I hereby am posting an official disclaimer about Cappy:

I have nothing to do with my little sister's fannish interests. She is the one who got me into Buffy and then Angel - not vice versa. Also, yes, I did show her a few Clex vids and then encouraged her to watch Smallville. I think Clex is a wholesome alternative to the whole Harry Potter thing she had going. Also, I know no one in Harry Potter - now I know what she is reading and she really likes the fluffy sweet stuff. Again - pretty wholesome and usually everyone gets married and stuff. OH - and this has also gotten her interested in the Classics - I mean before Smallville and hanging with me this summer, she thought Batman had superpowers.

Also 2: When the Boy and I left Saturday, I stole Cappy's copy of "Batman/Superman: Public Enemies" and he stole "World Without Superman" (which I don't get cause he has the entire run of comics, but he says we are missing some) and Cappy's Teen Titans. I didn't know he was stealing and he didn't know I was stealing until we stopped to eat at the Huddle House and we both whipped out the loot to read. I promise that all will be returned in time (well - except for the Teen Titans. He says that since Cappy originally stole them from me and I have since given him all my other copies -I don't remember this, I just remember all of them disappearing and then he had them - that in fact he was merely repossessing those books. I'm working on a peaceful solution). Tell Cappy that if she chills, I'll make it worth her while.